If it were up to me, every weekend would be halloween. That would take away some of the mental anguish and cognitive dissonance that comes along with finally choosing a costume. This year, I went through several phases. First, I wanted to do a Nash House tetris block group costume, then we changed it to Pokemon trainers (in which I, of course, would be Ash Ketchum), then, I think we were going to put on different patterned scrubs (K.I.S.S. Keep It Simple, Stupid). But somehow, after all of that planning and laughing and (apparent) delusions of grandeur, I settled on being some variation of a puppy dog with one other friend of mine (puppy BFF’s was the official name). Now obviously, I’m regretful of my bland choice, but this is what happens when you don’t make decisions fast enough. I want to tell everyone “This is not reflective of my creative abilities!” or “Let me try again next weekend!” but its too late, the pictures are up and you’re pegged: Mickey chose to be a dog– super lame. It’s fine, whatever, I shouldn’t care except for the fact that it kills me inside. My one chance to become another entity in this limited world. And come to think of it, I did it last year too. I was one of 100 downtrodden Super Mario’s on Bates College campus, our costumes merely a kick-me sign; a signet of failure. If you can take one thing from this blog, it’s TAKE CONTROL OF YOUR LIFE: SPEND TIME ON YOUR HALLOWEEN COSTUME. (and for future reference, that’s the only time I’ll write in all caps, it’s a pet peeve of mine).
I’ll stop beating myself up and instead focus our attention on how great my Halloween was in spite of this fiasco. Bates Halloweens are magical and often times when it comes to ratios of Halloween costumes, funny trumps slutty. It’s an important distinction to make I think, and something that’s indicative of the population at Bates. It’s a place for those of you who spend time on your costumes, who put blood, sweat, and thought into it rather than slap on some lingerie and say “I’m a mouse. duh.” That’s kind of what I did, regretfully. For example, one house made their home into an Abercrombie Store (the most horrifying): cabana shades over the windows, shelves with abercrombie on them, people decked out in abercrombie, the perfume . It was honestly amazing. It was one of those proud Bates parent moments: props.
There was a haunted house on campus which I told people I’d go to, but I pretended to forget. I don’t like them and I don’t understand them. Those and drive-through car washes are the two scariest things to me (and clowns, see below). I don’t like being herded through the dark while humans scream at me periodically: annoyingggg. I want to ash my cigarette on them. I’d almost prefer it if they actual ghosts and ghouls. Scarier? Yes. But at least I’d have some of those hard questions about the afterlife answered. Commons had one too, which I also told people I went to (and didn’t). At any rate, if you like haunted houses, I heard this one was particularly horrifying, and I don’t doubt it. The Halloween Dance, however, was especially precious. I always look forward to it: a masquerade ball of sorts, anonymity and imagination galore (at the risk of sounding like Willy Wonka). I ❤ Traditions.
p.s. one in particular which shall not be named, I wouldn’t want to spoil the surprise for those of you unaware.